Quotations, Memes and Jokes - Tom Swifties for Pippa

[jack]

Mainly stolen from the straight dope message board here: http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=247480 I haven't attributed individually, but please do if you steal just one.

• 'That scale's building up on my shower head again,' Tom said recalcitrantly.
  
• "My girlfriend fell offthe back of my motorcycle!" Tom said ruthlessly.
  
• "We don't have any flowers in our garden," Tom said lackadaisically.
  
• "Everything is A-OK" said NASA, initially.
  
• "Let's look for another Grail!" Tom requested.
  
• "I'm into homosexual necrophilia," said Tom in dead earnest.
  
• "I dropped the toothpaste," said Tom, crestfallen.
  
• "Show me Missouri," Tom stated.
  
• "That is an ugly shirt!" Tom said loudly .
  
• "This tuna is excellent," said Tom superficially.
  
• "You've gained a lot of weight, Auntie," said Dorothy emphatically.
  
• "Yes, I'm the Lord of the Dance," said Michael flatly.
  
• "I belong to the San Francisco chapter of Mensa," said Tom homogeneously.
  
• "Is your name Timothy or Russell?" Tom asked timorously