Choosing usernames that sound professional but like usernames

[jack]

Most online identities sound really dorky when quoted in non-online media such as news articles, etc. "The pentagon network was hacked today by the hacker known as paragon_fire". Is there any solution if you were hypothetically to want to choose a name that (a) wasn't just your real name, for whatever reason, but (b) sounded vaguely sensible and competent outside the internet?

(I can't think of any good examples. The closest are usernames based on most but not all of a real name, and names of websites rather than people.)