Friday Five: Christmas Q1

[jack]

https://thefridayfive.dreamwidth.org/84948.html

OK, this one will ALSO be long :)

1. Happy Holidays or Merry Christmas – which one do you use?

Oh gosh. My impression is that in (some parts/some contexts in) America an originally fairly minor distinction has become massively polarised by people who object to the thinking behind whatever they consider the "wrong" answer. And certainly, I like it when people make an effort to be inclusive, and dislike it when people pointedly object to any attempt to be inclusive. So if I'm in that situation, I'd rather choose the more inclusive greeting!

But that hasn't actually been my habit. If I was in a situation where I needed to give a festive greeting to everyone I met, I probably would choose "Happy Holidays" as a compromise to avoid guessing which people would like a "Merry Christmas" and which wouldn't, but I'm usually not.

And obviously, if I'm talking to someone I know or suspect doesn't celebrate Christmas, I'll use my best judgement if they'd rather be included anyway, or they feel Christmas is too overbearing already.

I'm not sure if "Happy Christmas" is less pointed in the UK, or if I'm just less aware how much people of non-Christmas cultures don't like it. I should have asked before now :(

But I also have a nagging feeling that "Happy Holidays", while well meaning and generally positive, has connotations I don't completely buy into. Like, it's easy to fall into a trap of assuming the way to be inclusive is to give everyone the appropriate equivalent for their culture, as if there's "Jewish Christmas", "Islamic Christmas", etc, etc all in December. And there's some truth to that -- lots of cultures do have a big "it's dark, lets do something with fire" celebration. But it's not a very good analogy. Hannukah is an awesome festival, but traditionally isn't one of the most important ones. Some Jews do enjoy making Hannukah "Jewish Christmas", but lots of Jews don't. And Islamic festivals are typically tied to the lunar year and don't happen at a specific month in the Gregorian calendar at all. Etc.

Like, yay multiculturalism! But maybe better to ask people in different cultures what's most useful (recognising when in the year their most important events are would be a good start in many cases, for instance), rather than adapting Christmas celebrations.

I think it's also that it might be that in America Thanksgiving makes it feel like there's a big spread of winter holidays maybe including Halloween, but from Thanksgiving through New Year? Whereas I'm not used to feeling that's a thing, I used to associate December with *looking forward* to Christmas, and feel like "the holidays" were Christmas day through New Year.

Comments

[cosmolinguist]

Yep I came here to say that "the holidays" kinda sorta include Thanksgiving and so it really is more natural and sensible to have a generic term for good wishes at whatever point in there people happen to be.

It helps that Thanksgiving and New Year, while not universally celebrated, are not religious holidays so it bookends the "holiday season" with things that are less contentious.

I am culturally though not actually Christian so I hate to say for sure that "Happy Christmas" is less contentious but from my perspective as someone used to the the U.S., it certainly seems that way to me.

[mtbc]

When living in the US it always felt as if the Christmas season immediately follows Thanksgiving, perhaps helped along by Santa arriving at the end of the Thanksgiving Day parades and then gift-shopping happening early the morning after (of course rather more flexibly and online-y these days).

[spikesgirl58]

I love how much thought you put into these questions. Thank you so much!

Being in a job in which we interact with the public, I have been abraded for using 'the wrong phrase' to the point that I have given up. It's sort of sad and, like so many other things, being taken to extremes. A teacher in the Midwest banned candy canes because if you turn them upside down, they form a 'j' for Jesus. Okay, then... whatever... I feel as if people need more in their lives to worry about so that they stop focusing on this stuff.

[damerell]

I tend to think of "Happy Holidays" as an Americanism and Christmas in the UK as essentially a secular gluttony festival, so "Merry Christmas". ;-)

[lokifan]

So agreed on the attempts to have Christmas equivalents as universal. I say "merry Christmas" too - I'd feel kind of embarrassed to say "happy holidays", it's such an Americanism.