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I occasionally read some [livejournal.com profile] mock_the_stupid. It's sometimes funny, though often a bit repetitive. I try to avoid it, because I always want to say "Ah, but what if..." and "If you define the words like this, it's not stupid" and "I think I said that once" and "It's a natural mistake, it needs to be ironic or at least punny"

But half a dozen items tonight made me think they were worth propagating abbreviated versions thereof.

Firstly, a wonderful example of out-out-out-out-pedanting

Student: I measured my heartrate like you said, but it doesn't change however I run.
Teacher: Hmm.
Student: Could my pacemaker be effecting it?
Teacher: *headdesk*
Poster #1: "Affecting"?
Poster #2: No, actually, it really should be effecting it -- or she'd be dead.
Poster #1: I think she meant "have an effect on", ie. affect.
Poster #2: I'm sure she did, but I think she *should* have meant "effect" ie. "cause to exist"
Poster #1: But it should beat anyway, if irregularly.
Poster #2: Ah, yes, it *affects* the heart *beat* but it *effects* the heart *rate* -- there would be no constant measurable rate otherwise.

In which Godwin doesn't apply, because Hitler is mentioned in the post

Something Awful poster[1]: [Large picture of Stalin]
Something Awful poster: HITLER. Thanks, I'll never be blamed as much as you.
Poster[2] #1: Funny, but not for the reason they thought. That's not him.
Stalin's picture: You got the wrong man.
Poster #2: It does look sort of like Saddam
Poster #3: I think it's supposed to be Stalin addressing Hitler.
Poster #1: Then it's REALLY badly designed.

But I was amused by the idea. How can you confuse them? OK, they *both* got involved in a land war in asia[3], and you can't tell by looking if his name is Schickelgruber or not, but everyone knows he has a tiny mustache, don't they?

Sex Education Class

Biology test: Name a method of birth control taken orally.
Student: Condom.
Poster #1: *mock*
Poster #2: Well, technically... I mean, it is birth control, and it is taken orally. Just, you know, not both at once.

Hot gay sex

Guy1: It's just sick. Two guys together? Eugh.
Poster: Do you think two girls together is sick?
Guy1: Uh...No. I mean, it's still wrong but it's not sick.
OtherGuy: *butts in* Two girls together is frickin' hot.
Poster: What if I told you that some women think the idea of two men together is sexy?
BothGuys: *horror*
Guy1: Well...If a woman thought that two men was...I mean...She's clearly a lesbian if she likes that kind of thing.

I won't touch the attitude, it's expressed smallmindedly, though I've suffer from being weirded out by what I'm not used to as much as everyone else. But I just love the last line. So logical. Yet, ironically, might he have a point? Oddly, one doesn't seem to have to primarily like men sexually to like slash.

[1] Poster, as in graphic depiction.
[2] Poster, as in, one who posts.
[3] OK, Hitler eponymously couldn't get to the Urals, but Top 56 Mistakes by Adolf Hitler is canonical, right?
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