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Some people have lives told in Shakespearean style. Bleak house. Austen. Saki. Anything. I have sitcom. Oh well :)
This will be represented as a rapid sequence of scene cuts, as I move from one bike shop to the other. Some humour will be evinced in repetition, some in breaking the repetition.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I see you have a selection. What's the difference between this £100 bike, and this £130 bike?
Him: *gormless look* It costs more. It has a, uuuhh, *looks at bike* better frame. And different coloured gears.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: So, do you have any bikes less tall than I am for under £230 pounds?
Him: No.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a town bike?
Him: *shocked look*
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a bike?
Him: I'm sorry sir, this is a hardware store.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: Two all-beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed bun.
Him: I'm sorry sir, this is subway.
** series of shots of me muching through a sandwich looking tired **
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a town bike?
** long pan down ten meter long row of off-road bikes costing £300 **
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a town bike?
Him: Why are you late for work?
Me: Well, I was *going* to ride in...
*sigh* And all those 0.14s transitions took me half an hour of walking. At least I had a book and a plot to write. But I'm 5'10 or 5'11, I'm not *that* short.
I thought it might be as easy as last time. Where else should I go?
This will be represented as a rapid sequence of scene cuts, as I move from one bike shop to the other. Some humour will be evinced in repetition, some in breaking the repetition.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I see you have a selection. What's the difference between this £100 bike, and this £130 bike?
Him: *gormless look* It costs more. It has a, uuuhh, *looks at bike* better frame. And different coloured gears.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: So, do you have any bikes less tall than I am for under £230 pounds?
Him: No.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a town bike?
Him: *shocked look*
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a bike?
Him: I'm sorry sir, this is a hardware store.
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: Two all-beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese pickles onions on a sesame seed bun.
Him: I'm sorry sir, this is subway.
** series of shots of me muching through a sandwich looking tired **
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a town bike?
** long pan down ten meter long row of off-road bikes costing £300 **
** 'blinds' transition **
Me: I'm looking for a town bike?
Him: Why are you late for work?
Me: Well, I was *going* to ride in...
*sigh* And all those 0.14s transitions took me half an hour of walking. At least I had a book and a plot to write. But I'm 5'10 or 5'11, I'm not *that* short.
I thought it might be as easy as last time. Where else should I go?