Doing the right thing
Feb. 27th, 2006 03:21 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jackDo you draw a distinction between doing the right thing because you want to and because you feel you ought to?
You might give a coworker a lift to their home, somewhat out of your way[1] because:
(a) You're happy to spend that time with them
(b) You want them to get home easily
(c) You feel you should, and want to because someone else may have to help you similarly, but actually think "agh, why today?"
[1] Purely hypothetical example.
In some sense they are the same, because your total satisfaction in doing it must be positive, or you wouldn't be doing it. But motivation feels like it matters.
Can you even define the difference? For instance, would you just make the problem go away if you could? Yes, in case (c). But why not in (a) and (b) -- you'd want to help, wouldn't you? Or assume your ethics seek to maximise happiness. Do (a) and (b) increase happiness in you both, and (c) in her only?[2]
[2] Where happiness is defined as genuine happiness, and your satisfaction at making happiness in others (possibly because you want them to behave similarly from similar logic, or out of gratitude, or just because you maximise hapiness) doesn't count, but is some sort of second order happiness.
And, habit will eventually convert you into a or b more often.
What fictional characters define this? Deep Wizardry (Diane Duane) makes a point of a truly willing sacrifice working better than someone who feels they ought to. But doesn't define it for us.
Carrot Ironfounderson probably genuinely enjoys helping people. Vimes I think is more I have to do this or I'm as bad as he is. Carrot seems a whole lot more happy about it. But is someone like that a better person? Does that question have meaning?
You might give a coworker a lift to their home, somewhat out of your way[1] because:
(a) You're happy to spend that time with them
(b) You want them to get home easily
(c) You feel you should, and want to because someone else may have to help you similarly, but actually think "agh, why today?"
[1] Purely hypothetical example.
In some sense they are the same, because your total satisfaction in doing it must be positive, or you wouldn't be doing it. But motivation feels like it matters.
Can you even define the difference? For instance, would you just make the problem go away if you could? Yes, in case (c). But why not in (a) and (b) -- you'd want to help, wouldn't you? Or assume your ethics seek to maximise happiness. Do (a) and (b) increase happiness in you both, and (c) in her only?[2]
[2] Where happiness is defined as genuine happiness, and your satisfaction at making happiness in others (possibly because you want them to behave similarly from similar logic, or out of gratitude, or just because you maximise hapiness) doesn't count, but is some sort of second order happiness.
And, habit will eventually convert you into a or b more often.
What fictional characters define this? Deep Wizardry (Diane Duane) makes a point of a truly willing sacrifice working better than someone who feels they ought to. But doesn't define it for us.
Carrot Ironfounderson probably genuinely enjoys helping people. Vimes I think is more I have to do this or I'm as bad as he is. Carrot seems a whole lot more happy about it. But is someone like that a better person? Does that question have meaning?
no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 04:00 pm (UTC)The thing is, if you don't actually like helping people but you do it out of a sense of duty, it'll register with them on some level, and they are going to feel uncomfortable, so in a sense everyone loses. If you do like helping people, they will pick up on that too and be happy that you are enjoying helping them, so everyone wins.
No contest!
no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 04:01 pm (UTC)But you say that as if you have a choice as to if you enjoy helping people or not. Obviously you're right: it's better if you do. But *deciding* to is trickier, if you can't enjoy it, it's still better to help than not...
no subject
Date: 2006-02-27 04:06 pm (UTC)I'm aware that I don't have a choice, but I suppose what triggered the phrasing of that comment was Mum's attitude; she acted as though I did have a choice. And, I agree, if you can't enjoy it, it is better to help than not... and to try to avoid making it obvious that you don't enjoy it! :-)