Dinner and DVDs on Saturday

[jack]

A few friends are coming to dinner and see my new cheesy classics Tron/Labyrinth on Saturday, at mine at about 7.00pm, probably with mead and heckling. Would anyone else like to join us?

We may also watch another DVD -- I'll probably try to persuade everyone to watch something I think they should see once -- or play some games.

(Edited for tact)
(May possibly be changed with respect to Becky's suggestions.)

Comments

[atreic.livejournal.com]

I didn't feel imposed or condescended at all. But then maybe I am just a mathmo with no social skills who doesn't see things that delicate pixies are affected by.

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

Aw :) Thank you. But then you almost certainly can't come anyway, so maybe you felt left out before it started :)

[atreic.livejournal.com]

I assume that you'll be at Susan's ceilidh on the 24th though? See you there!

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Unfortunately, I don't think I'll be able to make that one. That day there is:

Poohsoc AGM
Tolkien varsity quiz
GDS pub crawl
Ceilidh
Ghoti's party

And I think I can make at most two. It'd be good to see you, next time you're up, I hope :)

[uisgebeatha.livejournal.com]

Maybe that was badly-worded. But it just seemed a little arrogant to me, given that Becky has already been distressed by his assuming she knew about his party. Maybe I'm just more clued-up on tact, which many people, especially some acquaintances of housemates, don't have in even small amounts. I've no idea if this is exclusive to geeks/mathmos, but hey, IANA geek really. The fact that he has felt the need to leave in 'Edited for tact' speaks volumes of the, er, lack of it.

Delicate? I'm about as delicate as a cactus with metal spikes, my dear. Dontcha just love misreading the tone of LJ comments... *sigh*

[atreic.livejournal.com]

Personally I thought your comment sounded infinitely more arrogant than Jack's post. I'm getting bored of you going around slagging off the SGO because they don't behave exactly how you want them to. You can say we don't have tact, and you can say we're condescending and imposing. But no-one is making you hang around with us. And maybe, just maybe, we've formed a social circle like this not because we're incapable of hanging around with anyone cooler than us, but because we like the sort of world where we can talk about the things we're interested in, with people who are interested in similar things, without wasting time on the social niceties the rest of the world wants to bog us down with. You should think about that as an alternative interpretation.

[uisgebeatha.livejournal.com]

Hang on a second. Where in the previous comment did I attack the whole SGO? FWIW, I'm not telling anybody to behave the way I want them, but one thing I am noticing is that it is becoming increasingly different to separate 'personality traits people insist on ramming down your throat' from 'but apart from that they are a good friend'.

Hey, people in groups of friends are all different, I realise this, but the suggestion that you are making is that I go find people more like me, which frankly is offensive. And sorry, but the excuses like saying you have crap social skills or $problem isn't actually an excuse. So please refrain from using your mathmoness as an excuse to attack me.

I didn't read my original comment as rude in any way, and my reply to you was reading your comment as a bit patronising towards me. I also resent the fact you are, quite frankly, lying through your teeth saying I am going around slagging off the SGO. What is this, a playground scuffle? (For 'slagging off' do you mean *one* slightly snarky GJ post? Oh noes. Am I not entitled to speak my mind too? And that journal comes with a caveat lector anyway, or had you not noticed?)

I have more sense than to constantly slag off people. I do try and see things from other viewpoints, but sometimes it's hard when you feel like you're going into a conversation and not feeling equal because you're not cerebral enough/don't have enough issues or whatever. I button my lip and talk about other things, but perhaps that makes me vapid and not clever enough for you all? Shame, really; I'm happy to talk about whatever people want to, but I can't always have something to say, I suppose.

Define social niceties. DYM tact, confidence, useful skills or do they smack too much of fitting in with these apparently cooler people that exist somewhere? Your alternative interpretation was fine up until that point. You know what? Drop it. You have enough on your plate right now, as do I, to squabble over what's socially acceptable. I'm not in the mood for protracted debate, having exhausted it in this comment.

[atreic.livejournal.com]

I didn't read my original comment as rude in any way

Gosh. Then you might want to learn a few more of those soft skills that you think mean so much. Putting a smiley on the end of a sentance does not, contrary to popular opinion, suddenly alter the content of a sentance so it's no longer rude. I'm not suggesting that you must go and find people like you, I'm suggesting that if you don't like the people you've found you'll have more success finding different people than changing this group. Because I'm all for constructive change, but I'm not sure your alterations would be improvements :-)

[uisgebeatha.livejournal.com]

Right, since you've utterly failed to stop dragging this sorry mudfight on, I am taking this off LJ. I suggest you do the same and stop spamming my inbox with your petty insults.

[sonicdrift.livejournal.com]

You can't use Becky being 'distressed' as evidence of C.D. being arrogant or lacking tact. It was perfectly reasonable for him to assume she knew about the party given I told him I'd delivered the message as asked. It was also perfectly reasonable for him to have organised any event he wished at his house on any night he felt like.

Personally, I've come to conclusion it's impossible to frame any comment on LJ that someone can't take offense at if they really wanted to, and it's best to assume your friends won't.