(no subject)

[jack]

Q: Are you scottish?
A: Yes.
Q: Where are you from?
A: Scotland.
-- From an ceilidh. (Actually, that didn't happen, but it's how I heard it in my head, ok?)

Lesbian Speed Dating Pastiche Video via Vyvyan via Feanalwa A: I'm sorry, I'm just not ready for a relationship right now.
Lesbian Speed Dating Pastiche Video via Vyvyan via Feanalwa Q: ... How about now?

GINI: Mmm, sex. It makes anything better.
FERRET: Not prison.

Q: You might not claim it was the best of all possible sonnets, but it was a spectacular local maximum.
A: Aww! That's not only a lovely compliment, it's a maths related lovely compliment.

"I probably should give the cow the benefit of the doubt."
-- bugshaw.

"My Census Bureau contact tells me that the authors of the data file have seen the wisdom of my point of view, in spite of my unconstructive and unhelpful feedback (I said 'Wow, that is an incredibly terrible idea')
-- Mark Dominus

"[Readers[1]] may not have heard about it, because it concerns (a) India, (b) Australia, and (c) cricket. For Americans who are not international news junkies, the quantity of news encountered about any of these three topics in a week will typically amount to zero."
-- Geoffrey K. Pullum

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mornington_Crescent_(game)
Mornington Crescent (game)
[box: All or part of this article may be confusing or unclear.]

DM: 'you are an evil dice...I like that'

GM: 'It's semi-evil! Evil-esque.'

Q: So we have four and a half elves?
A; Whats the exchange rate?
Q: How many of us would we need to swap to get a dragon?
DM: What would the rest of you do once you'd swapped yourselves?
Q: We could take turns playing it.
A: Or play bits of it. I'll be the left wing.
A: Flap! Flap!

[1] Interestingly, the original referred to American readers, but taken out of context, I thought it a lot funnier when the country in question wasn't emphasised.

Comments

[alextfish.livejournal.com]

If you wanted to de-emphasise the nation in the Pullum quote, the second reference to "Americans" should probably have been removed too.

Also, I giggle at several of these. Particularly "I'm sorry, I'm just not ready for a relationship right now." "...How about now?"

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

If you wanted to de-emphasise the nation in the Pullum quote, the second reference to "Americans" should probably have been removed too.

Thanks. Actually, I did notice it, but decided that it needn't. The original started with "American readers," which sounds like a foreigner snarking at America as insular (which is sometimes very funny, if maybe mean, but I thought unnecessary here). However, although Geoff isn't actually in America, it sounded like he was writing for American readers as much as not, and people are having a laugh at their own country's news' idiosyncrasies. And not changing the first words would seem to break that idea, sounding like it meant Americans *specifically* whereas the second didn't contradict it.

That what was funny was the list, (1) Oz (2) India (3) Cricket, and something similar could be said of most countries. (Even if America (1) maybe more so and (2) is ignorant of cricket, rather than some other sport.)

I don't know if that's accurate, but I found it interesting.

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

Also, I giggle at several of these.

:) Go on, which?

It's awful, I'm always curious to know. (It reassures me I should go on posting quotes :)) But whenever I'm tempted to invent some sort of rating system for quotes/jokes I know its doomed (for lots of reasons, eg: been tried; depends on the person; depends on the immediacy; depends on knowing the people in question; saying "lol" is fun, but clicking "8/10" is boring :)).

Particularly "I'm sorry, I'm just not ready for a relationship right now." "...How about now?"

:) Yes. It was hard to encapsulate in text. The video was potentially worrying -- funny in places, but I felt sure it was playing on lesbian stereotypes I don't have, but are bad ones in some people's minds, and I couldn't tell if it was doing so in fun, mocking the stereotypes, or making fun of lesbians. But I felt that deserved quoting, though it was better in the original :)

[alextfish.livejournal.com]

It's awful, I'm always curious to know.
Oh, don't worry, I completely understand! Whenever I'm showing people NokkyQuotes (either online or on my PDA), I'm sure I must drive them up the wall by relentlessly asking "Which one?" every time they laugh. It's benign - my principal desire is to just be reminded of the comedy myself, and to share in it with them - but it's also insatiable.

So, then: my favourites were the one I quoted above, then the local maximum sonnet, the Pullum quote, the ceilidh quote, and the elves:dragons exchange ratio bizarrity.

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

"Nat: It's called a "door", Alex...", "A directed acyclic graph?", "I was surprised, I don't think of Ady as a... you know, a person", "No, would you rather be hit by a charging rhino, or by Saturn?", "I haven't done anything illegal for several weeks! [people scoff at him] ...I mean about girls...", "Yes, I believe that is what the punctuation symbol is called, yes..."

All ROFL :)

Oh and the tree thing totally makes sense!

I'm tempted to quote some of those, but enough seem surprisingly accessible to people who weren't there, I'll just link to it at some point, for the benefit of those friends who aren't already toothywiki :)

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

I'm sure I must drive them up the wall by relentlessly asking "Which one?" every time they laugh. It's benign - my principal desire is to just be reminded of the comedy myself, and to share in it with them - but it's also insatiable.

LOL. No, that totally makes sense. I think it makes a lot more sense in person, where it also makes it a more social experience. Mum and I do it when reading Pratchett, if something is funny enough to make us laugh, the one who's further through will ask what it was :)

bizarrity.

Yeah, it's hard to quote that sort of thing well, someone did a good job on that one. In real life I think there were flapping motions, and a lot more background comment, but you get most of the benefit in the quote :)

[vyvyan.livejournal.com]

The video was potentially worrying -- funny in places, but I felt sure it was playing on lesbian stereotypes I don't have, but are bad ones in some people's minds, and I couldn't tell if it was doing so in fun, mocking the stereotypes, or making fun of lesbians.

I doubt the video was intentionally mocking lesbians - it's from a sketch show on LGBT topics, with many gay actors, and produced by a gay rights activist.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Big_Gay_Sketch_Show
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rosie_O%27Donnell

[vyvyan.livejournal.com]

Oh, and I originally found it when it was linked to by a poster on an OU lesbian and gay students' bulletin board - she clearly didn't find it offensive.

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

Oh, well, that's all right then. I mean, seriously, all right, somehow "well that's all right then" sounds odd, but that's what I mean. Devoid of context I couldn't tell. Things that really *are* sort of nasty I (think I)[1] often see as fine, if I don't get the racism or whatever, so play safe sometimes.

[1] OK, so "(I think) I" would be more logical. "I (think I)" is funnier :)

[vyvyan.livejournal.com]

Heh. One of the barstaff in the Carlton last night handed me an unopened bottle of Frambosen for IWJ, saying, "Ian prefers to pop his own cork". That caused some amusement back at the table...

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

ROFL :)

I was most amused when I got a text message from sonic mid-evening, saying "Have you lost your marbles?" Laughing out loud like that totally disrupted the other players for a bit :)

[ewx.livejournal.com]

And your answer was...?

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

"Yes."

Although in other circumstances, it might have been "...not more than normal. Why?" or "OMGNAGH RED PARROT POSTBOXES SUSH. TWO CLUBS." :)