He's winning, but that scares him worst of all, because he doesn't know why he's winning,

[jack]

Cookie to anyone who gets the quote.

I've hosted quite a few parties by now. A success where everyone broke up into little groups and talked to each other, but also mingled with people I knew from completely other places, and got drunk, and porters visited, and much flirting and lap sitting went on. A party where no-one turned up. A party where everyone sat around in a big circle not knowing each other and being awkward. A joint party in the WPR, with friends' family included, which was surprisingly social, all in all. Various part way between dinner party and parties which have had various levels of success, but not especially.

I like to have a party because it's fun, it does a bit to repay people for good times I've had at their parties, it's a good way to get to know people better, it ensures a steady supply of social occasions. But, in true thinking about it too much style, I don't know if I should do anything more to prepare than the obvious of getting people to turn up, provide stuff, and hope we have fun. Is there anything particular I should? Am I turning into bridget jones? :)

Comments

[atreic.livejournal.com]

When I was trying to turn a play cast, half of whom had never been in the same rehersals, into a lean, mean, society, I took them all to formal, got them drunk, and then made sure there were silly games to play. (cardboard box game, jenga, twister, etc) This surprisingly worked. But then you don't want to have to cat herd everyone into playing stupid games they don't want to play. Maybe if you advertise parties with a gimmick "fancy dress party", "silly games party" "play readthrough party" you self select and get people who will throw themselves into it and have fun (CULES are kind of self selected in the first place) But for a sitting around talking party I think just making sure there's enough to drink (and making it clear if you're providing stuff or they should bring stuff) and to eat, a bit of sugar so everyone gets hyper (haribo!), and not having it so busy or crowded that it becomes oppressive is a good start.

There's an art to inviting people... you don't have to invite everyone you know to every party you have, and slightly "themed" people will naturally make a party slightly more fun by all enjoying the same thing. Hence mathmos will all watch "Look and See", silly games players will all play silly games, ranty political types will be happy ranting about politics, people who come to a ceilidh will all dance... (They don't all have to know each other already, but people will feel less self concious and have more fun with a group of people they're fairly familiar with than with lots of disparate strangers)

I don't know. I'm useless at parties.

[cartesiandaemon.livejournal.com]

I don't know. I'm useless at parties.

No, that sounds like eminantly reasonable advice. Thanks for your thoughts.

I think a gimic of some sort is good to get things going, but I never know what. I have *some* silly games, perhaps I should ask people to bring something... And I think by now I probably have some cult dvds. An internet connection would be nice because we can share 'you must see this spoof site' things, but I still don't.

There's an art to inviting people...

Yes. But it's tricky, because unless it's so few you can schedule round them you get a subset that might or might not be appropriate -- some people glue other people together well, some don't get on. For a dinner party I can do it, starting with inviting people and then inviting some more later depending. But this inevitably leads to people being left out, which shouldn't be a problem but can be.

They don't all have to know each other already, but people will feel less self concious and have more fun with a group of people they're fairly familiar with than with lots of disparate strangers

Sometimes I've just *known* some people will get on together and have been so right: I remember meeting tim's nearly-brother-in-law, and it was exactly like meeting Tim.