Jan. 4th, 2011

Hannukah

Jan. 4th, 2011 01:38 am
jack: (Default)
Hanukah

For a time, one of the splinter empires that formed after Alexander the Great died ruled Judea. Conflict arose between those on both sides, who were happy for Jews to adopt Greek lifestyles and culture, and those who refused. The emperor correctly realised that until the cultures assimilated, there'd be a core of identity around which resistance might form, and understandably, but unwisely in retrospect, tried to hurry things along.

Many Jews did not like this At All. They did not like this One Little Bit. Many revolted (known as the Maccabees[1]) to rebel and after much bloody fighting, eventually succeeding, and everyone immediately decreed that they should ever after commemorate the occasion by lighting fires and having a party and eating seasonally appropriate food[2].

At this point, God, who had been waiting breathlessly to rescue the situation miraculously, was disappointed. But in order that the celebration could have a place in the religious calendar, He performed a quick miracle involving some kind of oil anyway.

[1] I am not making this up. OK, I'm making most of this up, but not the name "Maccabees" :)

[2] As previously mentioned, this is the origin of essentially all Jewish holidays, although this instance is a bit different. If your girlfriend mentions a Jewish holiday, you can immediately look ever so well informed if you say with a straight face "oh, is that the one where you were very nearly massacred, but survived, and to celebrate, eat?" Although it works better with a Jewish girlfriend.

Traditions

Anything involving oil. Candles. Anything fried (Doughnuts, Latkes, etc).

A Hanukiah (typically a replica of the seven-branched candelabrum Menorah used in the Temple and sometimes called by the same name) displayed in the window with one more candle lighted each day.

A children's game involving wagering chocolate or other treats with the bank based on the rolling of a spinner called a dreidel (sp?). Apparently it is somewhat tedious and depressing to play but very entertaining and educational to argue about :)

Date

All Jewish festivals vary about a month in the Gregorian calendar. Hannukah falls somewhere between late November and late December.

My Hanukkah

I was invited to Rachel's Shul in Newcastle-Under-Lyme, where the Jewish students from the university were holding a Hanukkah party. Attendance was surprisingly good, including all the regular congregation, the students, and a couple of families with young children who can't normally come.

I didn't get to know anyone well, but I've seen her local synagogue which is very pretty, and met lots of people I've heard R talk about, or who I've met once at her housewarming, and who were very nice and welcoming, and now have a much better idea who they are.

Latkes are very nice.
jack: (Default)
Q. OK, so now you're officially engaged, NOW do you feel the oh so coincidental pangs for conversion?
A. No. Some congregations would view R much more favourably if I happened to be Jewish, but I would rather only convert to a religion if (a) I sincerely want to or (b) people are in genuinely danger of life and limb if I don't. I feel bad that the downsides fall more on her than on me, but I do not think if I were the sort of person who was going to stand up and lie to a Rabbinical court she would want to be with me in the first place :)

Q. But the penis thing doesn't help?
A. No, it doesn't help. But I would rather the main decision was made on personal integrity and honesty, rather than a superficial desire to avoid unnecessary body-modification. I may not have many principles, but it doesn't feel like a wedding is an auspicious time to start throwing away my few remaining ones :)

Q. But, maybe now you're starting to feel you DO sincerely want to?
A. It feels less impossible than it did several years ago, mainly due to many Jewish people charmingly inviting me slowly into their lives and ceremonies, seeing many lovely aspects of Judaism (the food, the arguing...), and an increasing awareness that the whole objection to the "God" thing is not necessarily an obstacle. It feels more like being invited to join a culture than invited to reconsider a factual premise (although other people feel that differently) which is much more possible, it feels like someone I could be -- but still not like who I am.

Q. OK, so no Judaism. How about "love, honour and obey"
A. No way. Any obeying will be strictly for efficiency in a crisis, or because it's kinky :)

Q. What about other quirky wedding customs, like rings, awnings, fire, etc?
A. Quite probably :)

Q. What were your favourite responses?
A. Probably mum's, because she was so pleased. But "congratulations" is clearly still a definite winner. Although extra thanks to everyone who added "squeeeee!" or "mazel tov" or ":D :D :D" which were all lovely.

Q. If you do live together, will you merge book collections?
A. Possibly not even then. We will probably continue to maintain an exit strategy (if only in case our careers send us to different places), either of having books separate, or of having books clearly joint and clearly re-acquirable if necessary. Even if we were living together permanently, there are not that many duplicates: there are a few old favourites where we have to keep both copies, and a few one of us has bought more recently at the other's instigation, when there's small emotional impact to keeping a separate copy, or donating it.

Q. This isn't quite an engagement but question, but what did you get for Christmas/birthday?
A. Mum gave R and I a pile of board games between us, which I helped her pick out, but gave christmas morning that so-desirable "pile of giant boxes" look. R gave me a dressing gown and I gave her a scarf, both of which are incredibly fuzzly. R gave me an e-book reader, which I'd resisted for a while, but is already incredibly useful.

Q. And what did you think of Magicians, by Lev Grossman?
A. It was awesome. It succeeds in writing a modern, mostly-adult novel set a wizarding university with actually academic magic rather than "point and shoot", and around characters who are have realistic twenty-year-old ambitions, loves, and fuck-ups, rather than predictable thirteen-year-old cliches. And in being set after Harry Potter, Narnia, Earthsea, When the Magic Goes Away, etc, etc, have entered popular culture, but not in being overwhelmed by them, just an occasional mention -- and a silent answer to many tropes, by writing so much better what an ACTUAL magician's chess would be like, intricate and magic-based.

Q. And any flaws?
A. The big flaws are (a) the reimagining/referencing/reinterpreting of tropes in classic works, while almost never explicit sometimes stuck me as too blatant, though it could be just me. And (b) the characters mostly blunder from event to event, without any overarching drive to achieve anything particular (not even to graduate), which may be realistic for 20-year-olds, but I don't find as entertaining to read as characters who are DOING something, however simple.
jack: (Default)
I was recently musing on different perspectives on marriage, and one in particular struck me. Romance is often cast as a game of meeting The One. Which I don't think is literally true, but probably has a lot of truth in, in the sense that a certain small fraction of people will make an excellent partnership with you, and most people will eventually meet one of them.

Awkward musing about fidelity )

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