Greeneders -- Supermarket Sweep Cartoons
Oct. 5th, 2006 02:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jackQ. Can I help you? What do you want?
A. What do I want?
Q. Uh, in the next half-hour, say.
A. Oh, then mushrooms hammered flat and flavoured of chicken.
Q. Ah, of course. Aisle 7, non-religious ethics, sir.
Q. Why is this shelf leaking corrosive green gas?
A. Ah! That's the low-sodium salt, sir.
Q. Why is "Cheshire" in the "continental" section?
A. Well, it is in the continent, isn't it?
Q. Well, yes, but so is the washing powder in the continent, you haven't put that there.
Q. For the record, I'm implying you could move the "cheshire" into the "cheese aisle", not everything else into the "continental" section.
A. Oh good. Otherwise no-one would be able to find anything, they'd have to look at every product in the store just to by bread!
Q. Uh.... I'll just stop suggesting things now, shall I.
A. Very well. Thank you, sir.
Q. Hi.
A. Hello, Jack.
Q. Maternal progenitor and respected sustainer of my existence, Greetings. [Yes, I actually do answer the phone like this. Sometimes. I think I've never yet to the completely wrong person; I will almost always have seen caller id.]
A. How and where are you? [No, my mother doesn't talk like that, unless she wants to get my attention.]
Q. I'm in Tesco's. Can we chat later?
A. Please.
Q. Also, would you say lightbulbs were more like binbags or DVD players? And do you remember who wrote
A Mathematician's Delight? [Yes, I do talk like that, though much more so to people who will think it's funny. And have requested in-store directions over the phone, though only when it's particularly convenient or funny -- it's wrong to do so habitually.]
A. What do I want?
Q. Uh, in the next half-hour, say.
A. Oh, then mushrooms hammered flat and flavoured of chicken.
Q. Ah, of course. Aisle 7, non-religious ethics, sir.
Q. Why is this shelf leaking corrosive green gas?
A. Ah! That's the low-sodium salt, sir.
Q. Why is "Cheshire" in the "continental" section?
A. Well, it is in the continent, isn't it?
Q. Well, yes, but so is the washing powder in the continent, you haven't put that there.
Q. For the record, I'm implying you could move the "cheshire" into the "cheese aisle", not everything else into the "continental" section.
A. Oh good. Otherwise no-one would be able to find anything, they'd have to look at every product in the store just to by bread!
Q. Uh.... I'll just stop suggesting things now, shall I.
A. Very well. Thank you, sir.
Q. Hi.
A. Hello, Jack.
Q. Maternal progenitor and respected sustainer of my existence, Greetings. [Yes, I actually do answer the phone like this. Sometimes. I think I've never yet to the completely wrong person; I will almost always have seen caller id.]
A. How and where are you? [No, my mother doesn't talk like that, unless she wants to get my attention.]
Q. I'm in Tesco's. Can we chat later?
A. Please.
Q. Also, would you say lightbulbs were more like binbags or DVD players? And do you remember who wrote
A Mathematician's Delight? [Yes, I do talk like that, though much more so to people who will think it's funny. And have requested in-store directions over the phone, though only when it's particularly convenient or funny -- it's wrong to do so habitually.]
no subject
Date: 2006-10-05 02:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-05 02:02 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-05 02:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-05 02:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-10-05 02:37 pm (UTC)"Ian Stewart" is a good first approximation. It came up in the context of recommending books for non-mathematicians at a range of level, when my other recommendation was "Anything by Ian Stewart or Martin Gardner" :)
The title "A Mathematician's Delight" does sound very Stewart, but I think the book was too straight forward to be his style -- no silly examples, no silly names, no plot :)