Too much stuff to do

[jack]

I constantly feel like I have too much stuff to do. That completely shouldn't be the case, unlike most people, there's nothing particular which is a giant problem, but I feel inadequate to take care of all the normal things. Especially, anything I've not done before, even if it's really little, I find very hard to do because I expect it to be a giant bureaucratic nightmare and I'm scared to start.

Comments

[gerald_duck]

Meanwhile, I'm here spodding as a reward to myself for having found the receipt I really wanted to track down. But I'm only part-way through a backlog of many months of paperwork. )-8

I seem to have the opposite problem: anything I've not done before is interesting, but I get bored after about the third repetition. This is actually a pretty good trait for a software engineer, but right now I'm fed up with having to hire a tree surgeon twice a decade, wondering how the process might be automated…

Though I also have the problem that winter has dragged on far too long. Yesterday was the first properly spring-like day we've had, and then only until dusk. If you have any propensity at all to seasonal affective disorder I bet you'll have had it baaaad this year.

[jack]

I seem to have the opposite problem: anything I've not done before is interesting, but I get bored after about the third repetition.

Hm, well, I definitely do that too. I think it's whether what I'm trying to do feels like something I should need to spend effort on and then be proud of, or not. If I'm solving some problem at work, I'd rather have the interesting one. But if I'm trying to fill in form X or hire tradesman Y, etc, I resent having to do it AT ALL, and it always turns out to have surprising prerequisites. Whereas if it's something I've already done, there is (blessedly) not as much busywork as I'd feared.

[jack]

I'm fed up with having to hire a tree surgeon twice a decade, wondering how the process might be automated…

Oh dear, yeah :) It's not just a matter of ringing up the same guy and saying "what you did 5 years ago, can you do it again?" I hate to say it, but for that sort of thing maybe a personal assistant is more effective than a purely technical solution? Although a centralised "book a tradesman" website would work if it could be implemented.

[gerald_duck]

Actually… ringing up the same people again is almost always my first option.

Similarly, let the record show I get mightily cheesed off with manufacturers who keep changing their product every few years. I only want to have to choose a shower gel once in my life, dammit! (-8

It has to be said that personal assistants sound a little… bourgeois for me!

[jack]

Actually… ringing up the same people again is almost always my first option.

Well, yes, that makes sense :) But it seemed it hadn't turned out that easy.

It has to be said that personal assistants sound a little… bourgeois for me!

Oh yes, me too very much. But I was thinking, I'd much rather have more time than more money, to the extent I'd consider working a four-day week -- but I'd much rather spend an extra day coding than an extra day doing bureaucratic faff, so it would be more efficient if did the coding, and someone else specialised in the faff...

[gerald_duck]

Ah! You mean a housewife? :-p

[jack]

Pretty much, yes, exactly. So many things, eg. delivery companies, assume everyone has a stay-at-home-spouse, which I can hardly believe. But as long as I don't have children, a full-time house minder is probably overkill. (I'm not sure if there's any appropriate concept somewhere between "virtual assistant" and "house spouse")

[gerald_duck]

The trick there is both to be able to accept deliveries at the office (for anything that's a one-person lift and can fit in a car) and to have the option of working from home once in a while.

Presumably the plural of house spouse would be hice spice?

[eudoxiafriday.wordpress.com]

I try to create an internal monologue that praises me for the things I *have* done and *have* taken care of, to balance out the auto-generated internal monologue that notices all the things that need to be done. Often these are pretty basic things ("You got to work on time! And you made your packed lunch yesterday, so it was right there and ready to take to work! Good job!").

It's not a strategy which solves everything (it's not like I magically have super-motivation to do everything because of it) but I think it's helped me quite a bit. It also gives me a way to admit to myself/notice when things are harder than average ("You got up on time even though you're feeling ill and headachey, that was a good move."). Without that kind of mechanism I tend to always expect myself to operate at peak efficiency, which is really unrealistic and unhelpful.

I'm also trying to train myself into thinking that there *are* some categories of task where it's much better to do a half-assed job than to do nothing at all (mostly I try not to start something unless I think I can finish it properly, but this isn't always helpful). E.g. a partly-cleaned kitchen is better than a completely-messy kitchen, even if it's not as good as a totally-clean kitchen. And it makes it easier to get to a totally-clean kitchen sometime in the future.

[jack]

*hugs* Yes, that.

[rmc28]

On your last paragraph, my mother recently gave me the mantra "if it's worth doing, it's worth doing badly", for exactly those kind of tasks. I find the trick is convincing myself that something falls into the "better done badly than not at all" category.

[forestofglory]

*hugs* I know that bureaucratic nightmare feeling.